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But with brothers I find, that they, too, have internalized a particular relationship to the body-type most associated with the mammy figure.They see girls like me as sisters, as homegirls, but not as love options, because they don’t find big girls sexy.I’m all those things in a culture that not only hates fat, and finds it repulsive, but also in a culture where fat dark-skinned women can only find roles in movies as maids.Even so, one could argue that these mainstream films reflect the desires of white America, or more to the point, white men, and not Black men, which up to this point is the only group of men I’ve dated.

When I look in the mirror, for the most part, I like what I see.

as women is difficult, because it can make us feel powerless and/or less-than-feminist.

So posts like this make folks uncomfortable, often leading to three kinds of reactionary (and unhelpful) comments. Even though we all have insecurities, self-confidence is not my major struggle.

The number will usually total up to no more than 2 or 3 mind you.

Those stories ring hollow, because they ultimately amount to a futile attempt to amass enough exceptions to disprove the rule.




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It is crystal clear that millionaires are people who have had the finer things in life. For that reason, you need to have some distinctive attributes.


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On my way over, she sent me a string of long texts about exactly where I was supposed to park. Needless to say, I never texted her back after that.