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Via Richard Wiseman’s excellent book 59 Seconds: Change Your Life in Under a Minute: As a result of the interviews, the researchers speculated that the best strategy would be to give a potential date the impression that in general you were hard to get (and therefore a scarce resource worth having) but really enthusiastic about him or her specifically.

They tested this notion by using some of the same techniques…

Humor is attractive to men and women — but not in the same way.

The research shows women like men who make them laugh, and men like women who laugh at their jokes.

They found, however, that males showed higher average levels of humor production ability, which is consistent with the sexual selection perspective.

From these results, Greengross argues that a sense of humor evolved at least partly through sexual selection as an intelligence indicator.

Women tend to prefer men who make them laugh, whereas men tend to prefer women who laugh at their jokes.This can be taken to extremes: having someone try to kill you can actually make you more attracted to them.Via The Heart of Social Psychology: A Backstage View of a Passionate Science: Those in the high-fear condition did show, for example, significantly more desire to kiss my confederate (one of the key questions) and wrote more romantic and sexual content into their stories.Given that he has just an hour or so to create the intimacy levels that typically take weeks, months, or years to form, he accelerated the getting-to-know-you process through a set of thirty-six questions crafted to take the participants rapidly from level one in Mc Adams’s system to level two. The intensity of the dialogue partners’ bond at the end of the forty-five-minute vulnerability interaction was rated as closer than the closest relationship in the lives of 30 percent of similar students.In other words, the instant connections were more powerful than many long-term, even lifelong relationships.




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