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If anyone had told me ten years ago what my life would be like today, maybe just showed me a video of an ordinary Tuesday evening in the life of contemporary Steve, my eyes would’ve bugged out.

I never had any idea things could be this good, that I could be so confident, that I would so often feel like smiling for no particular reason.

I’m so used to being gay and Catholic, I forget how strange that sounds.

I forget that, for some people, “homosexual” describes something like a different race, or maybe even a different gender.

Which is not to say that I don’t strongly identify with those parts of myself that people often conflate with being “gay.” I’m musical, I’m verbal, I’m intuitive, I have a strong aesthetic sense.

But men with SSA don’t have a monopoly on those things, and the fact that I have those characteristics doesn’t mean I belong to some special culture; it means I’m myself, and not anybody else.

You might as well talk about gluten-intolerance culture, or musician’s rights.You might also try Melinda Selmys’ Sexual Authenticity and Wesley Hill’s Washed and Waiting. And maybe the most important thing: you can do this, but not alone — and the Church may be your greatest ally.Maybe you don’t understand yet why the she teaches what she does; but don’t quit listening.He blogs at gaycatholic.com, under the semi-pseudonym of Steve Gershom, about issues of faith, sexuality, and mental health.Michael Chabon is his favorite living author, and Dostoevsky is his favorite dead one.

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