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Honestly, swimming and drinking beer in the nude is such a novelty that we can't help ourselves.One contest has us diving under water to the bar counter (you can open your eyes in the thermal shallows) then arising like Zeus to sup a pint in gales of laughter. A cutting-edge area of the spa, it's where the detoxification process begins.In a warm, beery haze, our winter worries peel away. With 25 wellness areas ranging from a Finnish log cabin to a citrus-scented hammam, it's the world's largest sauna complex.Loungers in the Alhambra dry sauna are evenly spaced out around a central circle.Therme Erding may boast an array of eateries from a Caribbean restaurant (nude) to a schnitzel joint (clothed) but nothing speaks holiday like a sunken pool bar.It's a slice of pure Tahiti, ringed by as many palm fronds and parasols as appear in their day-glo cocktails.Indeed, Therme Erding's thermal source was only discovered by accident by the US petroleum giant Texaco in 1983.After years of geothermal research, the energy firm drilled for oil but found only a steaming lake of mineral-rich water.

We scorn such anthropological studies by indulging in our own parlour games.It's not the nudity that shocks visitors to Europe's largest thermal spa. On a wintry Friday evening on the outskirts of Munich, post-work pals aren't watching TV or heading out for drinks.Instead they're sitting at Therme Erding's pool bar wearing nothing but an electronic wrist tag, which tots up how many half pints of local Erdinger lager they've supped through the night. It's a classy Center Parcs – with frankfurters, but without the clothes.We head to the Vitality Oasis, the largest and strictly adult-only section of the spa.A giant billboard of a nude couple makes clear that we're about to enter a compulsory clothes-off zone.

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